Pirates of the Caribbean II: Dead Man's Chest

The Pirates of the Caribbean movies are the damnedest things. They have awful stories that sound as if they were written by a two year old. Most of the actors, particularly Orlando Bloom, exhibit less than stellar performances. Finally, the movie trudges along in almost an infantile atmosphere. Characters are chased around by skeletons or giant hermit crabs. Yet, I was still entertained by this movie. In fact, I was excited to see it and charmed when I left the theater. What accounts for the mixture of affable feelings and intellectual disgust? I think I have the answer. First, the movies have style. The sets are neat, the costumes are effective, and the childhood monsters have a feeling of whimsy and fun. Second, Johnny Depp, Johnny Deep, and Johnny Depp! The movie utilizes one of the best character actors (and indeed, one of the best all around actors) to its advantage. Johnny Depp has created the most interesting pirate in the history of cinema. Although Captain jack Sparrow is a grizzled veteran of the seas, he is also afeminant and has a penchant for trapping himself in compromising situations. No matter what Captain Sparrow does, the audience is enthralled by this reactions. In sum, if it were not for Depp, who commits so deeply to his character, and for a tiny bit of style, these pirate movies would be a joke.

The second installment of Pirates of the Caribbean (there will be three in the series) has an easy plot that seems more complicated than it really is. Orlando Bloom wants to get married to his anorexic bride, Kiera Knightly. However, a Lord (we have no idea who he is) stops the wedding and arrests them. The Lord strikes a deal. In order for Bloom and his bride to get freedom, they must chase down their old friend, Captain Jack Sparrow, and steal one of his possessions. The other half of the plot is that Jack Sparrow is searching for something called the Dead Man's Chest. In his way is the amphibious Davy Jones, who captains a ship of sea creatures. The movie ends on an unsure note, forcing us to see the third movie to find out what happens. That is plot. I am not kidding.

The most perplexing aspect of the movie is the fact that it manages to be entertaining despite the fact that almost everything in the movie is awful. First, Johnny Depp does not have nearly enough lines. In the first movie, Depp's character was embedded in our minds through witty phrases and insults. In the second movie, Johnny does more prancing than talking. Second, Orlando Bloom is a one dimensional character; we neither love nor hate him. We do not care whether he lives or dies. The third movie will need someone better to carry the second main character. Third, a question that continues to haunt me: why are all the pirates in these movies of a supernatural kind? Finally, I was really annoyed at the constant allusions to the pirates ride in Disney World (like the dog holding the prison guys). It is time to treat this adventure for what it is: a movie and not a novelty.

Despite the above problems, which included a dumb plot, I still enjoyed this movie. Somehow, perhaps through the charisma that radiates from Johnny Depp onto everyone else, the movie entertains and puts a smile on your face. You forget that the plot is witless. You forget that Johnny Deep is fighting big hermit crabs. The movie pulls you into its nonsensical corny world and does not let go. Where the plot lacks, two things step in to take its place. First, the audience wants to see what will happen to Captain Jack next and his reactions to it. Second, because the movie is so ridiculously over-the-top, it becomes a morality play between the forces of good and evil. Even though we do not care about Orlando Bloom, we know he's the good guy. Even more interestingly, within this working reality play, we have two gray characters, Captain Sparrow and Captain Barbossa (aptly played by the talented Geoffrey Rush). Are they good guys? Are they bad guys? Are they a mix of both? The movie coalesces everything bad and good into a very enjoyable experience.

Was Pirates 2 as good as the first one? Not quite. Was it enjoyable? Yes. Will we all scramble to see the third one next year? You bet!

4.0